lampoon your pantaloon
THE SUNDAY FUNNIES
by Milk dud
Dedicated to Michaelangelo, the Archangel on his special day, when he saved the bull. For real.
yes Uriel may drive the chariot of the sun but Michael is the enforcer, so to speak, riding shotgun like a heavenly Carmine
copyright the angels of Mount Carmel etceteras!
According to Pasolini and Tolkien (not sure where Thoreau landed on this one) comedy and tragedy are both stepping stones, or stumbling stone skandalones if you cannot accept it, to Eucatastrophe which alone proposes an eternal solution to existential woes. Just saying.
Thus, the comic relief that follows is the first step to Eucatastrophe, when the weight of glory gets a bit heavy and needs to be set aside for a moment. JEJE.
Few in hollywood realize that the Carmine Street basilica in midtown manhattan is built entirely of fossilized milk duds, which were melted down before the Mount Carmel Wars (which predate all this afghan iran kazakstan kerfuffling by many centuries) to fuel Uriel's golden chariot, which picked up not only Elijah but a whole mess of unknown saints.
These saints would practice glorious hymns on Saturday evenings on the roof of the basilica or else Le Bain, or a townhouse on 23rd where applicable, and Uriel's fleet of dreams would pick them up --provided they were wearing the monte caramello milk udd scapolarios--in time for for Paradise Symphonic Services on Sundays.( more on this later. SOme would skip the services and head straight for the pastries, noting that Mass was a good reason anyways to wear Ferragamo and Versace, plus off brand tatters.)
the jag's east coast contacts had sent a supply of duds out west via mule pack, but these were intercepted by a greedy weinstein during his stint in the prison kitchen.
Claiming he needed the duds for a carmel apple project for thoreau, he shamelessly stuffed his pockets with the treats one afternoon, then Neocities.
WALDO WEDNESDAYS WITH RAFAEL ERNESTO EMERSON I CANT STAND IT
i cant find the cell phone cable. As the moon rose over the Hudson, The ghost of Thoreau kayaked up the Hudson towards Pier 42, flanked by master mariner Moxie Marlinspike in a 15 foot hobie cat.
The kayak was loaded down with wild apples and ran a bit low in the water as they pulled up to Chelsea piers, planning to set up an artisanal cider stand to fund more walden woods projects with a checking account from wells fargo wachovia or whatever. where is wachovai anyways
Thoreau however was dressed like a redneck and got arrested for churro vagrancy, ending up cellies with Jag, coloring lessons, who had jacked one too many ferraris, maseratis and bugattis from Manhattan Motorcars, and weinstein who had been moved back to brooklyn because his attorney quit after candyman threats connected to the milk dud caper.
Emerson came to bail him out with money from the Harvard Endowment. meanwhile moxie was scuffling with the wolves of wall street who accused him of hacking their whole economy just because he felt like it one time.
the mavericks escaped in a haze duster which had been left at jfk by ivan stropko who was irrigating the rooftop gardens on 23rd street with oversized stropkos. meanwhile milk dud frustrated at jemmys refusal to buy her a room at leos with fungobel fruit tarts hopped a train loaded with flat tires from the fast and furious. it happened to be piloted by the pink panther who was trying to blend into the urban landscape but stuck out du to his pink conductor uniform.